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Heeeeeeeeeeeeey [22 Jan 2005|08:54pm]
[ mood | chipper ]

Long time no entry!!

Now, I could create a super uber long entry to update you on all of the crazy events that have happened in my life since the last entry - BUT - I have better things to do lol.

So - instead I will just post day by day and fill you in with things as they come up. K? K!

Right now I'm at Jose's (my new bf). I'm on one of his many comps (now you know why I made him mine lol) and I'm downloading episodes of One Tree Hill via BitTorrent.

I'll post again soon - but for now, hello!


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And I was all like...WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! =D [02 May 2004|06:57pm]
[ mood | excited ]

[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<img </center>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]

<TABLE width="300">
<TD> <center><img src="http://www.sharemation.com/lostdreamer/quiz/happy.jpg"</center> </TD>
<center>You're just too damn happy... Someone needs to come up and hit you upside the head... What the hell is wrong with you?!<br><br>What's <i>You're</i> Problem?<br>Take the quiz at <a href="http://spilled-crimson.tripod.com/quiz/prob.html">† Spilled Crimson †</a></center></td></tr>

Hehehe...it's true lol.

I'm sooooooooo giddy lately! Everything is planned out to the tee! I've got my $, my plane ticket, places to stay, job interviews, everything! TORONTO HERE I COME BABY!!

I've lots to say - haven't written in awhile, and won't write again for awhile either!! BARE WITH ME!!

I'm leaving for Toronto early Wednesday morning. Staying with Brock until Sunday, and then my best girl friend Renee for a couple weeks until I get my first pay check. Then I'm out on my own!!

I'm coming back here as soon as I've got about $1500 and I'm in my new apt..prolly late june/early july. I'll fly back here with people friday evening, load the uhaul, drive to quebec on saturday, and then drive back to ontario and unload in time for dinner on Sunday! That way I won't miss any work!

I have a couple of job interviews for this Friday. One at a recruitment firm, working about $14/hr as a receptionist and admin assistant. She asked me how I rated my skills with MS Word, beginner, intermediate or advanced - I immediately said definately advanced!! MS Office is my biatch! I got 97 in that damned chips for dips course - this job will be easy as pie! I also have an interview for hostess/waitress at the new Montana's in mississauga. Lots of openings so I'm sure I'll be able to get one! Won't start work til the 21st though. If they let me, I'd take both jobs, the receptionist one is only 30 hrs a week, 9-3, or 12-5, so either way I'd be able to work at Montana's during evenings, nights and weekends!

Staying with Brock will be nice. His birthday is next week, but by then he'll be up north =(. He's taking me out for dinner this weekend which should be nice =). I'd like to do something for him but I'm totally broke! I'll think of something free though =D. I like to be creative lol...

Last but not least - wts leafs!! Okay up until now the first four games in this series were played beautifully, even the two losses at first! But today??? GG BELFOUR!! It seems like now that Joey is back they think they don't need to be as offensive as they were at the ACC. BRING IT BACK PLEASE!! We had zero shots on goal until the last minute of the first. WTS?? LEAFS IN SEVEN kthx

Anywho, my laptop has gone back (took 12 700mb CD's to backup all my stuff), so I can't be on the net as much as I like. Also, once I'm in Toronto I wont have a comp at all, so my time online will be scarce!

EITHER WAY I'm totally in a happy place right now! I'm excited for life, big changes are happening, and I'm feeling really good about my new found independence! Soon enough I will rely on nobody but myself, and that's a good feeling =D.

Good luck with everything, everyone - enjoy your summer! I'll talk with ya when I can!! I love you all - bye! <3 XoXoXoXo

PS - Happy belated, Shane!
PPS - Doug Robb is hot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!+++++++
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Ready to Move On [25 Apr 2004|07:16pm]
[ mood | energetic ]


Funny joke from one of my communities ^^

Anywho. Not a whole lot new. Officially living at home now, means I'm gonna have to start going back to church with my family on Sundays. My dad holds a position in the church, and as a result my family is pretty religious. I'm probaby going to be singing a duet with my 11 year old sister one week. Should be nice, I love to sing, and even if I'm unsure of my own religious values, I still enjoy singing the songs. They're so pretty and if I get to accompany them on the piano than thats an extra plus.

I'm feeling pretty optimistic about the move to come. I'm used to change, and I'm finally feeling a sense of closure for the 'Acadia' chapter in my life, and am really looking forward to a new start in Ontario.

Still haven't completed the job hunt, but it's kind of stuck in a pending state until I'm sure when I'll be able to go up and start any position. I have a physio treatment tomorrow, so we'll see how that goes.

Enjoying the rest at home. Never going hungry, sleeping in a big bed, having cable in my room along with wireless internet? Not having to wear 'shower shoes' nor wait to use the laundry machine? Hello! How could I not be happy? The weather is starting to get really nice, but I can't do a whole lot outdoors thanks to the knee. I like to sit in the gazebo though, we have a pretty nice view in our large yard. It's quiet out there, and I find it really easy to write.

Spending time with my family is also important to me, as I'm moving soon and won't see them that often. It's not a huge deal, I mean, I didn't really see them that much before, but just knowing that I'm officially moving out for good kinda sets a bit of a mood on the whole house. I must have played Monsters Inc. Life at least four times now, and I've refound myself in the bounty of crafts me and my younger sibs create!! Chilling with family, especially younger family, really helps put whats important in to prospective. Just being happy, living life for the sake of living, and not for anything else. I love my family, I will miss them, but as with all my friends at Acadia, I will be totally psyched to come visit them in the fall!!

I'm feeling pretty calm, excited for the summer, but happy with what I'm up to now.


PS - Leafs Game 2 (minus joey) tonight, as well as the Trading Spaces Home Free LIVE finale (not that I watch TLC home decorating shows or anything ;)..)

New Found Glory - Heaven Isn't Too Far Away (Warrant Cover - Live) LyricsCollapse )

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Personality Test [24 Apr 2004|09:19pm]
[ mood | peaceful ]

Extroverted (E) 56.41% Introverted (I) 43.59%
Imaginative (N) 58.14% Realistic (S) 41.86%
Emotional (F) 54.05% Intellectual (T) 45.95%
Organized (J) 51.35% Easygoing (P) 48.65%
Your type is: ENFJ
[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<td [...] left">') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]

<div align="center"><!--56.41 58.14 54.05 51.35--> <table style="color: black; background: #eeeeee" border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td> <div align="center"> <table style="color: black; background: #dddddd" border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td> <div align="center"> Extroverted (E) 56.41% Introverted (I) 43.59%<br> Imaginative (N) 58.14% Realistic (S) 41.86%<br> Emotional (F) 54.05% Intellectual (T) 45.95%<br> Organized (J) 51.35% Easygoing (P) 48.65%<br> </div> </td> </tr> </table> <table style="color: black; background: #eeeeee" border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td> <div align="center"> Your type is: <b><font size="+3">ENFJ</font></b><br> </div> </td> </tr> </table> <table style="color: black; background: #dddddd" border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" width="100%"> <tr> <td width="280quot;>> <div align="left"> You are a Persuader, possible professions include - entertainer, recruiter, artist, newscaster, writer/journalist, recreation director, librarian, facilitator, politician, psychologist, housing director, career counselor, sales trainer, travel agent, program designer, corporate/team trainer, child welfare worker, social worker (elderly services), interpreter/translator, occupational therapist, executive</div> </td> </tr> </table> </div> </td> </tr> </table> <a href="http://similarminds.com/career.html">Take Free Career Inventory Personality Test</a><br><font size="1"><a href="http://similarminds.com">personality tests by similarminds.com</a></font></div>
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Humour found in a lj community I'm a member in.. [23 Apr 2004|03:16am]
[ mood | amused ]


Ha ha ha.


sorry, hi =D

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Transition [23 Apr 2004|02:22am]
[ mood | sad ]


I'm home now. Have been for awhile, but now that all of my stuff is here and I know that I'm not goin back, I've this lingering sense of sadness. Regret that I didn't do more things while I had the time, anger that it wasn't my fault because of the knee injury from the stupid car accident. Sad that I didn't say goodbye properly to all of the people I will really miss, and most of all I'm feelin pretty lonely. I've little to no friends in falmouth, I wasn't ever here long enough to make any! Brock is leaving soon, and then I won't have any contact, phone, internet, anything until the end of the summer. Sure I'll be excited when I get to Toronto and can see all my old friends, but that's not for awhile yet. And not only do I have a couple weeks to go alone before I get to Ontario, but I've got to spend them shacked up, inside my house, @ rehab or in the hospital getting surgery. (We've decied afterall to just get it all cleared up here before I go. Just easier that way.)

I guess I'm trying to stay optimistic. Keep reminding myself that soon I'll be in Toronto. Soon I'll be on my own. Soon I'll see my old friends. Soon it'll be summer. Soon I'll be able to walk freely again. Keep reminding myself that it's okay, I don't need to feel like I'll never see all the friends I've made this past year ever again, because I will indeed visit. But its hard. Especially at night. Especially at night when few people are online, and even those who are, are the ones who've just come from the party I couldnt get a ride to, and are fairly intoxicated.

I'm lonely. I feel like crying. I have this lingering in my heart. The kind where no matter how hard I try to find somethng to do, no matter how hard I try to make these next weeks pass by with silly things like, staring a live journal, posting on thunacme, etc, I'm happy for like 2 minutes before that lingering feeling reminds me again of whats really going on. Its horrible. It makes me feel weak! I don't like being pessimistic or dwelling on the bad, but its just so hard to do when you feel alone.

Even when I do get to Ontario, things are gonna be rough for awhile. I'll techinically be homeless at first. Staying with friends for the first few weeks until my job starts putting money in the bank. After I get $ and have my own place, it'll still be kinda lonely. Not all of my friends will be there this summer, and I will be working an awful lot. All year it's only ever been 2 months inbetween the times Brock and I would see each other. That time would fly because I'd be busy with school, friends, etc. Now it's going to be the longest time without seeing him. I last saw him in the beginning of March. I won't see him til the earliest the end of August. 6 months! Thats half a year! And how wonderful is it that it works out the longest time without him will be the time I've less to do, and more time to miss him.

I have no idea whats going on between us as far as love goes. But romantic or not, I love that boy if even as just a friend. I love him to pieces! And I already miss him so much! I don't know how I'm going to handle four more months! I'm only a third of the way there!

I guess though, the tougher things are at first, and the more I have to put up with stuff, the better things will work out in the end. I'm gonna have a weird summer. Lots of ups and downs, what with missing friends, adjusting to changes, but also seeing old friends and having freedom. But no matter how many hours I put into my new shit job, no matter how many times I cry over missing friends, or my family, or being homesick for nova scotia at all - in the end it will be worth it. Come fall my life should be in high gear. Financial security, a more permanent place to call my own, all my friends coming back, my birthday! I think by my 19th birthday I'll be super happy Alli again, on top of the world. I'm not unhappy now. I still smile and giggle as per usual. But there is a sort of overall mood that I just can't seem to kick.


Maybe some sleep will do me good. Although, I can't stop thinking and thats kinda preventing any sleepage.

Goodnight everyone, I really do love you all. I'll miss all you scotia folk - and I will come to visit! Keep in touch!

<3 Alli

Lyrics to exactly how I feel right now. I'm gonna go play it on the piano =PCollapse )

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Ring ring..Oh Hello - Long time no speak! [22 Apr 2004|07:18am]
[ mood | contemplative ]

Brock and I talked on the phone for several hours last night. We were civilized - this is new as of late! It was a lot like old times, we laughed and chatted about nothing, but everything. We went through old e-mails, some hilarious, some slightly more serious - mushy love stuff. It felt really nice to talk with him again. Just casual talk like we used to have, no drama. It felt so nice, that several times I forgot we're no longer together, and would have to catch myself before I'd call him baby, or hunny, or tell him how cute I thought he was and how much I loved him.

Sooo...what does that mean? Nothing? Just something that needs getting used to? Or does it mean theres still something there? Something worth trying for again come fall when we'll be reunited? Maybe it's a sign that we really are better as friends? The relationship drama just pushes us apart, ruins a really good friendship that we've developed over the last couple of years?

Meh. Crazy lil thing called love. So tricky! Thank God I have such a strong belief in fate, and that "everything happens for a reason". It helps me sleep at night knowing that, although things are unclear now, no matter what decisions I make, what's meant to be, will be someday - regardless.

No matter what, I hope Brock and I remain good friends. He really is an amazing person! This is making him really sad, obviously, but its weighing him down more so than me because I've so much going on to help me not think about it. Sometimes that really gets me, even if we're just great friends, what great friend am I to cause such pain?? Aah I guess I'll just roll with the punches. I'm more then confident the break was a good idea - if I really thought it was that bad I wouldn't have ever brought it up. Right?

Hmm. Comtemplative, yes. But profoundly calm and peaceful too! Good time to try writing some lyrics...I think I'll do that....<3

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QUIZZESSSSS [22 Apr 2004|04:40am]
Adding more and more!

Fix'd the pic issue!

In the image source code, there is a missing "/user_images" directly after the images.quizilla.com in the url! Also!! It should read live.quizilla.com not images.quizllia.com!! Just add /user_images and replace the 'images' with 'live' and it should work!!

img src="http://images.quizilla.com/V/vinacross/1041991326_fPerfectGF.gif
img src="http://live.quizilla.com/user_images/V/vinacross/1041991326_fPerfectGF.gif

I'm sorry, but this one is just way too ironic (I mean really go figure..):


What's your sexual appeal?
brought to you by Quizilla

MORE Quiz Results!Collapse )
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Hello life!! [21 Apr 2004|03:15pm]
[ mood | energetic ]

Okay so we've worked out the physio thing, and being that it is covered by the insurance, and it's gonna take awhile anyways, I'm going up to Ontario and I'll have the surgery there.

I've worked out all the lil things, like rides, cash for three weeks until the job starts payin - and even places to stay until! I'm so excited everything is working out! As soon as I'm there it'll be like I'm really beginning my life, ya know? Working, on my own again, lookin into the business, gettin a better place soon with friends, workin on my liscence, maybe even some more night classes! Hooray for life!

Excited for that, and kinda sad about everyone gone/leaving. I still have to rush back to Acadia and grab all my stuff - and return my baby (the laptop)!

I don't have a definite job yet, but I'm in the process of applying for exactly 47 positions!! At least one or two will wanna hire me! ...right?

Huzzah life...and huzzah leafs! Honestly though, sens fans shut up, we win, please just deal with it!

Brock and I talked, we miss each other and still feel for each other like crazy, but we both agreed the time apart will do us good! That helps put my mind at ease!

Okay so for now my to do list is:

- finish updating resume, attach cover letters, send off
- finalize living arrangements/rides
- back up all my files off the laptop
- pack up all my stuff from Acadia
- I'd like to say goodbye and take a pic of me with ppl @ Acadia but so many are gone already...=/
- return laptop
- buy plane ticket as soon as arragenments are for sure
- pack up stuff for Ontario (minimum...I'll have to come back for the rest - ROAD TRIP!! w00t w00t)
- get outta here! Toronto - Alli's comin back baby!! This summer is gonna rock!

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Nah nah...nah nah NAh nah...HEY HEY hey..GOOD BYE!! [20 Apr 2004|10:48pm]
[ mood | ecstatic ]

(posted on thunacme, but not everyone here is a member)

He shoots...HE SCORES!! x4!!

Yes, it's clearly "all because of belfour"...I mean, he's obviously the one who's been scoring all these goals. Whats that? We've scored every game in the last 8, not to mention the SIX NOTHING to end the season? Ya...totally "all because of belfour".

So ya, I can understand you being bitter that we have an AMAZING goalie, unlike *cough*laline*cough*...but the 'team Belfour' jokes have gotten old, and they're really dumb. It's a TEAM effort, and this year we've got an amazing line-up...everything is working together so perfectly, despite the fact that our captain is MIA. Obviously a nearly legendary goaltender is a huge asset to any team, but as are our amazing forwards, who slip at least one past your "sacred" laline EVERY time.

I laugh SO hard when I see msn names cluttered wtih "YA, WELL YOU ONLY WON CUZ OF BELFOUR"...its like saying, "ya, well we only lost cuz we suck"...doesn't anybody else see how retarded this sounds? You think you could do something creative, or half logical, like blame sketch calls, or back-up the fact that you have had some pretty courageous shots on goals.

But whatever, despite it all, the last min no joey, the lackage of sundin, the stupid calls in the first game that cost the win, the CONSTANT attacks on tucker!! And all the other hockey drama...we won, fair and square, and now I won't have to hear anymore of your excuses as to why you lost until next season!!


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My hidden truth! [20 Apr 2004|08:54pm]

discover what candy you are @ quiz me
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GO LEAFS GO!!! [20 Apr 2004|08:35pm]
[ mood | ecstatic ]

Less than 8 minutes in to the game : TWO NOTHING LEAFS!!

EDIT: End of 1st - THREE NOTHING!!

EDIT: Early 2nd - THREE ONE, must admit that was a good goal, eddi just barely missed it!

EDIT: Less than 8 minutes into 3rd : FOUR ONE!!! HELLS YES!



^^ Official scoresheet/gamelog


<3 I asscone the leafs!

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Gah, enough is enough! [20 Apr 2004|11:01am]
[ mood | annoyed ]

So I just got back from the doctor's. He referred me to a physiotherapist - I start today. I'm too see him again next week and if the therapy isn't helping than as a last resort I'll go under the knife. As much as I hate hospitals, and the thought of surgery makes me sick to my stomach - the thought of being able to walk properly again and get on with my life already is WELL worth the cost!!

Speaking of cost, although the therapy and surgery are covered, I've got to go through all this tricky stuff with Brock's parents insurance company (it was his car we were in the accident with). Sometimes I just wanna hunt down the stupid man that ran the red and delayed my life, ruined the end of my year at Acadia, and just hit him over the head with a shovel or something! GAH!

Well, off to therapy!

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Tossing and Turning...and Typing? [20 Apr 2004|07:05am]
[ mood | anxious ]

It's 7 am and I haven't been to sleep yet. I've a lot on my mind, what with the surgery, moving, the end of school, stupid relationship problems...bleh. But it's all good.

I've a doctor's appointment at 9:30, so OF COURSE I'm actually starting to get tired, lol. After the appointment I've gotta head back to Acadia to do up some more packing. It feels so weird that the year is over, and that a lot of the new friends I've met here I may very well never see again! But, all and all, I'm staying pretty optimistic about the whole thing. I get to go back to Toronto, back to the busy city life - which I must admit I adore. I'll be working again, and living on my own. After I've saved up enough, or gotten a better paying job (besides the crap one I've settled for for now to just get me going) I'll be moving in to a place with some friends. I figure come september I'll be all settled, job, house, friends, etc. Which is perfect timing because my 19th birthday is in the end of september. That's my goal, to have everything dandy by my birthday, so that I can go out and have the best one ever!

The summer should be interesting. I get to see all my old friends, I'll have money again, and be able to do a lot more. Everything seems like it should be awesome, all though im unsure how to react about not seeing Brock all summer. He's working up north from may til september, so I won't see him at all. This may be good, I mean, it will test our "break" and let me know if this is really how is should be. But, even if we are just meant to be friends, that doesn't mean I don't wanna see him! He's lots of fun, and its too bad all summer we won't be able to chill at all. But I've more than enough other friends to keep me busy, I'm sooooo psyched! Beaches, amusement parks, drive-ins...just being outside! Hooray for summer! If it ever comes that is...oh, and not to mention my knee will finally be better. No more gimpy!! w00t w00t!

Well, I'm totally psyched now, as if I wasn't already having trouble sleeping lol. Can't wait for my life to really get back up to speed. Nothing has been the same since spring break, what with my dad being sick, the car accident, family issues, school issues! Damn strike! But, everything happens for a reason, and this has just opened another chapter in my life. I'm glad to have been at Acadia, I've met sooo many wonderful people. But, it's time for me to go back to Toronto. There is nothing left for me here, nothing to help me towards my future. But - it'll be awesome to come and visit a few times next year!!

I just can't wait to have the knee fixed and be healed! As soon as it is, I'm off! (Mixed feelings, sad and overwhemingly excited)

AND OH YEA: Toronto is moving on to round two tonight!!

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Let it Rain [20 Apr 2004|03:06am]
[ mood | lonely ]

I killed a spider tonight. I was sitting here on my laptop (go figure) and out of the corner of my eye I spotted the HUGEST spider I've ever seen. It freaked the crap out of me, and after coaching myself back into a calmer state of breathing, I scanned the room for something to squish it with. I picked up this huge tin box out of the closet and proceeded back over to the eight-legged thing. I stopped to look at it for a second, as much as it creeped me out, it was kind of interesting too. I got too close however, it started to move, I spazzed and I dropped the huge box on top of it. Mission complete. ADD kicked in, and I noticed that this box was indeed one of my memory boxes. I opened it for the first time since the move in august, and was swamped with a flood of memories. Besides the typical photo albums and scrapbooks, there were articles from all different events, a craft from grade two, a poem from grade eight, and even a recipe I had made sometime during high school. Everything was so wonderfully familiar, and brought a great sense of joy. Then, at the bottom of the box, layed a stack of old diaries. I picked up the last of the stack, the most recent, and opened to read the last entry.

"...It hurts so much to be alone. But I guess my heart fairs better alone than it does to be with someone who does it more harm than it does good. Its weird living life without Matt in it. For so long he was such a large part of my life, he really was my everything. How could it all go so wrong? Well I guess it was always that messed up. I was just to nieve to see it. Well then how could I be so blind? Maybe I was just searching so hard for someone to love that I subconciously ignored the signals that he was only out to break my heart. It doesn't matter now. It's over. As sad and lonesome as I am, there is this lingering sense that everything will be okay..."

I wrote that, along with a list of my qualities for a "perfect" man, on February 22nd, 2002. Oddly enough it was on February 25th, exactly three days later, I met Brock. Looking back, he was, and still is everything that is on that list. By my defintion, he is perfect. Things were perfect. Everything was perfect except the distance, which would be solved come fall. So what's wrong with me? Why didn't it feel right? I was happy, being that I was with a man so wonderful, but something was missing. I tried to explain this to Brock, in hopes he felt it too. He didn't. We had already taken a break in our relationship due to the distance, but it seems more than ever that we may never get back together. I hurt him by questioning our love, and I broke a trust with his heart that I may never get back. I didn't set out to end our relationship completely with the break, but it's certainly put us in a new light. Maybe there is a thing as too perfect. Or, maybe I'm just being dumb, or afraid. Either way, my confusion has led him to destruction, and I'm fearful we will ever be the same. Fearful even more so, that this may not be such a bad thing.

I killed a spider tonight. I killed a spider, and I broke a heart. His. And my own.

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I'm New! [09 Mar 2004|06:18am]
I'm going to start using this often...but for now, this is just a place holder!
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